ruthlessly to ensnare one's enemies, to sow confusion
and panic, to move others to emulate the narcissist
The language is appropriated and expropriated. It is
considered to be a weapon, an asset, a piece of lethal
property, a traitorous mistress to be gang raped into
submission. --Sam Vaknin, author, Malignant Self Love.
Pathological lying is one of the hallmark characteristics
of a narcissist, who does it out of a need to manipulate
and maintain control. For the immature narcissist there
is an essential emotional truth: lying is an expression of
his (or her) mistrust of others; and his (or her) need to
maintain a fragile sense of self at all costs.
Being honest (and therefore vulnerable) terrifies the narcissist.
Since his primary goal is to control others, through projection
he constantly fears that others will try to control him. Thus,
lying becomes the modus operandi through which he can
maintain his superficial presentation of himself and keep
people from learning the truth of who he really is. He never
allows himself to be "pinned down", or accountable. More lies
are always necessary to cover up a previous lie. And typically,
he even begins to believe his own lies and become outraged at
any suggestion that he may be lying. Thus he becomes sincere
in his lying and others may actually believe the lies because of
the sincerity. This is why truly pathological liars (such as
sociopaths) are so hard to detect in the population. In general,
the lack of an ability to feel guilty about the lies, and the
perverse sense that he is "entitled to lie" are standard for the
narcissist.
Having said all this, it is important to remember
that lying, no matter how pathological it may be is not in
itself a disease. EVERYONE LIES. Most psychological
tests have built in scales that detect this tendency to
make one's self look better to others.
When you combine an overwhelmning need to make
one's self look better (i.e., superior) with a grandiose
sense of self-worth; throw in glibness and a superficial
charm that easily convinces others of your sincerity;
then there is little to stand in the way of easily
manipulating others to your will. Of course, it behooves
you to also throw into the mix that whatever you do, you
do it for the sake of others. Children are a good standby
(as in, "do it for the children!").
Let me refresh your memory about some basic psychological defense mechanisms.
Denial, which is an immature defense is defined as an
attempt to reject unacceptable feelings, needs,
thoughts, wishes--or even a painful external reality that
alters the perception of ourselves. This psychological
defense mechanism protects us temporarily from:
-Knowledge (things we don’t want to know)
-Insight or awareness that threatens our self-esteem; or
our mental or physical health; or our security (things we
don't want to think about)
-Unacceptable feelings (things we don’t want to feel)
One type of denial is Repression , a neurotic defense
characterized by a seemingly inexplicable naivete,
memory lapse, or lack of awareness. Repression is
often dismissed as an artifact of diminished attention by
cognitive psychologists, but I find that it almost always
reflects a rather creative method to resolve some inner
conflict for the person who uses it. With repression,
affect is out in the open, but the associated idea is out
of the mind and unavailable to consider. Someone who
has repressed some knowledge may be genuinely
astonished that anyone would consider them to have
deliberately ignored the issue.
The "forgetting of repression is different from ordinary
forgetting in that there is often some sort of parallel
symbolic behavior that goes along with it.
http://drsanity.blogspot.com.au/2009/05/narcissism-pathological-lying-and.html
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